Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Qiddie Quotes

All quotes are from girls, unless otherwise noted.


2 y.o.: *knock knock*

3 y.o.: “Who is it?”

2 y.o.: “Death!” (not sure what she was trying to say)



a rabbi's daughter, 3 y.o.: “eeny meeny meiny mo, catch a bible by the toe”

3 y.o.: “Hashem’s house is pink with strawberries on it.”



me: “That’s an example of someone trying to be funny and failing.”

3rd grader: “And it’s not me for once!”



3rd grade boy, running out of the room on last day of Hebrew school: “I’m never coming back!”



3 y.o. boy: “I’m gonna buy all this.”

me: “How much does it cost?”

3 y.o. boy: “One hour.”



4 y.o. #1: “You got to be the mom a jillion hundred times!”

4 y.o. #2: “That’s not even a number.”

4 y.o. #1: “AHHH!!!!!”



4 y.o.: “Pink is my favorite color in the history of the world.”


4 y.o.: “She’s walking away without her baby. That’s not, like, safe.” - doll. baby DOLL.



me: “You have to go so bad?”

3 y.o.: “No, BADLY.”


3 y.o.: “Look what I got from my nose.”



3 y.o.: “I only have this much chips because it’s a bummer.”


3 y.o.: “Today I’m going to West Portal in a cage to go to the zoo in Africa. I’m going to Africa.”



5 y.o.: “I speak Ebrew because I go to Israel every ear.”


5 y.o.: “It looks like the T Jesus was on.”



2 y.o. boy: “Bubbe has to feed grandpa.”


2 y.o. boy on top of the structure addressing two girls: “I’m pooping!”


3 y.o. boy: “I’m old!”

3 y.o. boy: “I’m not Jewish, I live in Burlingame.”



3 y.o.: “I’m much older than all of you.”


3 y.o.: “She’s only 2. She doesn’t know everything. Only I know everything.”


3 y.o. #1: “What’s inside here?” (teapot)

me: “Probably just air.”

3 y.o. #2: “No, there’s puffing.”

me: “Puffins, like the cereal?”

3 y.o. #2: “No, PUFFING, like what’s in HERE.” (stuffed animal)

me: “Stuffing?”

3 y.o. #2: “Yeah, stuffing!”


3 y.o.: “I one time had a boo boo but I don’t know where it is… it’s in my house.”


3 y.o.: “I wanna show everyone my pimples.”


4 y.o.: “I’m only going to look at you if you stop talking while you’re eating.”



3 y.o.: “Rebecca my favorite friend… and Ariel, too.” (she's referring to Ariel the Disney mermaid)


3 y.o. offended that I had the same favorite princess as her babysitter: “Who your favorite princess? … Belle? Tara love… You love Poccahontas!”


3 y.o.: “I have poof hair.”


3 y.o.: “Dora Splisplora!”


3 y.o.: “Uh-oh, I made a ‘steak!”


3 y.o. #1 asks 3 y.o. #2, who was “showering” in the closet: “How was your shower?”

3 y.o. #2: “Great!”


3 y.o.: “I don’t want Rebecca to eat my blanket.”

me: “I don’t think she will. Does she usually eat your blanket?”

3 y.o.: “No, only me.” She was either trying to say that either she only eats her blanket, or Rebecca only eats her, which she did try to do once.


3 y.o. immediately upon arriving in the morning: “I burped in my dad’s car.”


4 y.o.: “This is ‘I love you, Garbage.'” reading a tattoo that said "I <3 Recycling"


4 y.o.: *forced laugh* “That’s my freaky raff.”


4 y.o.: “Where is HaShem? Can we talk to HaShem?”


a very responsible 4 y.o.: “I’m a set up the chairs because you’re busy doing snack.”


4 y.o.: “I don’t know what he’s talking about. My dad’s kind of…”


4 y.o.: *wrapping hair around chin* “Fear the beard!”


4 y.o.: “I need to taste these. That’s why I’m taking a nipple.”

4 y.o.:“Where’s your DROID?”

4 y.o.: “Look at my killing truck!.. Actually, look at my baby station.”


4 y.o.: “Throw your guns at the shark!”

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