Time Limits

Friendship can be a tricky thing. Sometimes you might really like someone, but sometimes they make you want to lock yourself in a closet. You know what I mean? Some people you can spend hours on end with, and some people –who may be perfectly nice—you can barely make it through a movie with. And it isn’t that you don’t like them, it’s just that your time limit is shorter.

You have time limits with everyone you know. Hopefully your longest time limits are with people you spend a lot of time with, like you partner. Otherwise, you have a problem! I think time limits are an overlooked aspect of friendship, but it is one of the most important factors. Even among the people I would call some of my closest friends, there are different time limits which greatly affect the way we interact.

Good friend #1. Good friend #1 rarely ever calls, and frequently ignores me on facebook chat. On the rare occasion that we actually see each other, we can spend a whole day together. Despite being kind of a crappy friend, he has a long time limit.

Good friend #2. Good friend #2 is an excellent friend. She always is seeing how I’m doing, she’s lent me money without me asking, and she’s always down for whatever. What a great friend! But I find that after 4 hours I start to lose it. That’s because she has a medium-length time limit.

Annoying girl #1. Annoying girl #1 is a very nice person, very cheerful. Too cheerful, actually. She was in my circle of friends for a while. I could tolerate her personality for an hour. After that I would excuse myself. And I would not agree to do anything with her which might stick me with her for longer than that.

Annoying girl #2. Annoying girl #2 was a challenge for me. Again, she is a nice person, and a good friend to those who have longer time limits on her. Unfortunately, my time limit with her was only a few minutes. After that I found it nearly impossible to not make snarky comments at her. She didn’t do anything to me, I just can’t be with her for more than five minutes. Other people seem to like her just fine.

Annoying guy #1. Poor Annoying guy #1. He has a negative time limit with me. I get irritated before he opens his mouth. Just seeing him makes me want to throw things at his nasty face. Again, this guy is perfectly nice. It just so happens that even the possibility of having to interact with him expends my entire time limit on him.

I think the idea of time limits on people is very real, and that people would benefit from adopting the concept. It really adds an interesting dimension when describing other people. And in cases where you have a short time limit on someone, you are able to put the onus on yourself, rather than blaming the person for their grating personality, which they just can’t help. It also is a way of clarifying why you like someone who maybe isn’t that great of a friend. Now you don’t have to feel bad when you get sick of hanging out with your best friends—it’s not your fault that some of them have shorter time limits!

Me According to Facebook According to You

Thanks for voting, people! I greatly enjoyed laughing at you getting things wrong. Here are the results!

If you like The Ramones, Pink Floyd, The Cure, David Bowie, and The Sex Pistols, you might like: 77% said The Clash. Correct!

If you like Bangun Tidur, Bangun, Pulang, and Mandi, you might like: 50% said Thai food. Wrong! I have no idea what these things are, but they all came up because I like BREAKFAST.

If you like Heavy metal music and Punk rock, you might like: 50% said psychobilly. Wrong! I do like psychobilly, but these came up because I like SKA.

If you like Neil Gaiman, you might like: 40% said Amanda Palmer, 40% said Coraline. Close enough! "Many who like AMANDA PALMER like Neil Gaiman," which is good because they are dating and it's always so awkward when you don't like your favorite celebrity's boyfriend.

If you like Bon Iver, Fleet Foxes, Radiohead, and Animal Collective, you might like: 57% said Arcade Fire. Wrong! Fuck that, I like BEIRUT.

If you like Dinner and Sleep, you might like: 62% said sandwiches. Wrong! Only one person guessed correctly. BREAKFAST again has bested you.

If you liked Camping, Walking, Crocheting, Crafts, Painting, Cooking, Knitting, Reading, Country music, Scrapbooking, gardening, baking and CSI, you might like: 62% guessed sewing. Correct! For the record, I don't like camping or crafts; I can't crochet, paint, or knit; I can't cook or bake for shit; I do like a lot of country music, but I've never told anyone so clearly facebook read my mind; I hate CSI; and do people actually scrapbook? They don't just save a bunch of crap saying that they're going to use it in a book and then never do?

If you like Futurama, Family Guy, Scrubs, and Two and a Half Men, you might like: 50% said The Simpsons. Correct! But 37% said American Dad. People, no one likes that show. Come on.

If you like Social Distortion, you might like: 44% said The Clash. Wrong! The one person who said TIGER ARMY was a genius.

If you like HOPE not Hate, you might like: 44% said Israel/Palestine. Wrong! I do like Israel/Palestine, but this organization came up in response to liking BILLY BRAGG, who only one person voted for.

If you like Edward Scissorhands, you might like: 62% said Beetlejuice. Correct!

If you like The Notebook, you might like: 75% said Sex and the City. Fuck you! I've never seen The Notebook, and Sex and the City makes me throw up in my mouth. This one was suggested to me because I like MEAN GIRLS, which is a way more accurate/funny portrayal of female behavior.

If you like Traveling and Movies, you might like: 42% said concerts. Correct! I don't really like traveling or movies, but good job anyway.

And at the end of it all, I think two things are clear:
1. facebook suggestions were super nutty
2. democracy doesn't work