Things got a little hectic as my stay in Israel came to a close. I spent 6 nights in a row away from Jerusalem, then moved out of my apartment two days later.
11.1 The last few days of the school year lacked any kind of educational instruction. Students and faculty had both given up. On the second to last day the school provided tents in the play yard to provide shade. Perhaps some kind of activities were going on in there, but I doubt any teachers had the motivation for that. Sarah’s 4th graders who I read with all made me the same cards. My English-speaking 5th grader made me a card. Tali got one out of my four 5th graders to make me a card. He drew a picture of the Grinch. Tali got me a Michal Negrin notepad. She left the receipt in the bag, and she forgot to have Sarah sign the card. Bye!
11.2 Career Israel had an epic closing seminar in Shefayim. We were given back the goals we had written down on the first day. My first goal was to unfriend at least 3 people on Facebook. I also wrote “I want to make out with at least 2 ppl. at least. srsly.” I shared with the group first. It seems that I was my old wild self at the beginning and end of the program, but for a few months I really couldn’t be bothered. The talent show was the best part of the seminar, because I won it. Well, co-won. The MC’s did a great job, and they put together a contest for Mr. and Ms. Career Israel 2009. The winners had to collect the most points through a number of trials including making a wedding dress out of toilet paper (my contestant won by dressing me), how many pieces of Bisli they could fit in their mouths, and how long they could say “ehhh.” It was brilliant! A vote was taken to determine superlatives. I was nominated for “Career Clown” along with the freakishly tan Jersey girl and a French girl. The Frenchie one! People told me that she’s really crazy and should be medicated. I was fairly offended. In addition to all that, there were also talents performed, but clearly mine was the best since I won. I read a tribute to an artist who sucks. The idea came to me while I was in the shower. It was the first time I’d ever done comedy like that, and it seemed to work. I got a lot of laughs and compliments. Go me! The boy who also won went to UCSC with me. He drummed. He’s good at that. We split our bottle of wine- I downed my half in 10 minutes. Then we had a dance party! The next day we went to a water park, and that was the end of it all. Some suckers still had work, though.
11.3 I didn’t go home after Shefayim. Lucky picked me up in Tel Aviv, and we went to her apartment in Haifa. I stayed there three nights. We visited the Baha’i garden briefly to look for souvenirs. Apparently Baha’i don’t sell souvenirs. I had asked my mom’s cousin if I could stay with him for three days after I have to move out of my apartment. He called me back to suggest that I stay with his ex-wife instead, and to notify me that his father had passed away. Conveniently, the funeral wouldn’t mess up any of my plans.
11.3 I had one very busy Sunday. I wanted to go to the other Baha’i garden in Akko, so Lucky took me there- partially to get really good humus. Akko is a mixed city, but some of the street signs lacked Arabic, which I thought was just rude. We had very tasty humus. The Baha’i garden there also didn’t sell souvenirs. Lucky decided to save me the trouble (and shekels) of taking a bus to Nahariyya, so she drove me. That was very helpful! From there I took a sheirut (shared cab) to Ma’alot, where I met up with a friend from elementary school who got married at 19 and has a toddler. The funeral was in the evening in Netanya. I took a sheirut back to Nahariyya, but then missed the train to Haifa. If only I had known that there are toilets in each car! By then I was running late, so Lucky offered to pack my suitcase for me and pick me up at the train station. Very useful! She drove me straight to the funeral. A tour bus of old people was just unloading. Apparently my uncle Jack had been very involved in his synagogue. He had stomach cancer, and he couldn’t bear to live without his late wife, who died last year. He was 92.
Baha'i garden in Akko
Ma'alot
I had never been to a Jewish funeral before. His body lay wrapped in a talit on a gurney. A young and awkward rabbi spoke, followed by my mom’s two cousins and a shul congregant. He was wheeled to the grave, and a few Orthodox fellows pulled him into the grave. They placed heavy stones across him, then allowed people to fill the grave with dirt. I felt sad for my grandma—Jack was her big brother. A number of people went to Jack’s house for evening prayers and food. A relative—who shares great-grandparents with me—drove me to Tel Aviv, where I met Lucky at Sub Kuch, a terrible Indian restaurant and guest house. I wasn’t in the mood for open mic. I slept at Lucky’s house in Ramat Efal, which is always amazing because they have things like central air and a dishwasher.
11.4 Lucky’s mom drove me to Tel Aviv, and I took a bus to Yafo. Yafo is one of my top two favorite places in Israel. It’s so damn cute, and the shuk there is the bomb. You can see all of Tel Aviv along the beach. I had my suitcase with me, so I found a youth hostel and left it there. They didn’t really care that I didn’t have a room. I met a friend from Santa Cruz, and we bought scarves from a man in the shuk. I had been there before, and I went back specifically to him because he only has scarves and tapestries, he’s not pushy, and his prices are good. He doesn’t speak English, but he didn’t know how to say “wide,” which was really helpful. My friend is very warm, so when the merchant’s wife came in, she asked her to teach her how to wrap a head scarf. She demonstrated on both of us. I ended up buying 9 scarves for my friends! Unfortunately my camera battery died, and I didn’t have enough money to buy a new one.
In the afternoon I visited an adult friend in Ra’anana. This woman is the step-mother of a boy from my elementary school, went to my shul, and helped me write my college essay. She also gave me my first full-time job babysitting when I was 18. I really like her! We had a lovely time, and her kids were so cute that I began to want to be a teacher again. Incidentally, her stepson—my classmate from elementary school, high school, Hebrew school, and college—called while I was there. He unfriended me on facebook a while ago. Awkward!
11.5 My last real adventure was going to Nachalat Binyamin, the bi-weekly artists’ market in Tel Aviv. I bought hamsot for my grandmothers. There was a lot of cool stuff I wish I could take. I got jahnun for the last time. Then I finally went back to crazy-ass Jerusalem.
11.6 I spent my last night in Jerusalem packing and cleaning alone. All of my housemates were gone. I was starting to freak out about how much I had to do and how I was going to do it when I got a facebook message notifying me that my favorite band is going on hiatus after their last two August shows. I have seen The Matches 37 times over the past 7 years. I love their music, I love them, and above all I love the community that has grown over the years. A number of popular local bands have folded over the past few years, and each time the scene lost something. The Matches are really the core of what’s left. Additionally, I don’t even have the money for a ticket. I was more upset about The Matches than I was about leaving Israel.
11.7 My mom’s cousin’s ex-wife—hereon called “aunt”—picked me up early Friday morning, but of course the CI madricha was nowhere to be found. There was still a lot of moving out to do, and only my slow housemate Justin was around. My aunt took over like a true executive and took whatever food and kitchenware CI wasn’t going to take. There were dishes in the apartment when we moved in, but the madricha wanted the kitchen emptied. I spent Shabbat with her and her daughter who was too sick to do anything. They live across the street from an Arab village. We heard hammering in the morning, and my aunt correctly predicted a wedding—fireworks included! My aunt had over her ex-sister-in-law and her daughter and her adorable family (who I met at Passover) for dinner. The power went out because the kum-kum was broken and sucking all the power. Israelis all have electric kettles which boil water in about one minute. Americans are really missing out on this appliance. Not only did she turn the power back on (not allowed on Shabbat,) but she experimented with the circuit breaker until she figured out what the bad appliance was. The two of us had very interesting discussions about politics and religion and gender.
11.8 Lucky picked me up from my aunt’s house in East Talpiot. We went to the Old City where we failed to find a hamsa in Portuguese for my house-cleaner. The first merchant we went to handed us a hamsa in Spanish when we asked for Portuguese. I said I also needed one in Spanish, and he said he only had Portuguese. Really?? Then he changed his mind and found one in Spanish, which was of course identical to the “Portuguese” one. We left. The rest of the merchants said that I would never find on in Portuguese. We got one that says Jerusalem for our house-cleaner, and one that has the blessing for the home in Spanish for a friend from shows who has Mexican heritage. I got a necklace with a small hamsa charm for a male friend. We made one last stop in the boonies to return my phone (and Justin’s, and his friend’s), and that was the last I saw of Jerusalem.
I went to open mic at Sub Kuch with Lucky. Her dad came, which was real cute. They sang a song together. I also sang “Oasis” by Amanda Palmer with her. Leah wanted to see me before I left, so she walked to Sub Kuch. We got Japanika one last time, then went back to Beit Leni with Lucky and her boyfriend. We sang “Oasis” again, which was well-received. We went home at 2, and we had to get up at 4:30 for my flight. Goodbye, Beit Leni.
