Time Limits

Friendship can be a tricky thing. Sometimes you might really like someone, but sometimes they make you want to lock yourself in a closet. You know what I mean? Some people you can spend hours on end with, and some people –who may be perfectly nice—you can barely make it through a movie with. And it isn’t that you don’t like them, it’s just that your time limit is shorter.

You have time limits with everyone you know. Hopefully your longest time limits are with people you spend a lot of time with, like you partner. Otherwise, you have a problem! I think time limits are an overlooked aspect of friendship, but it is one of the most important factors. Even among the people I would call some of my closest friends, there are different time limits which greatly affect the way we interact.

Good friend #1. Good friend #1 rarely ever calls, and frequently ignores me on facebook chat. On the rare occasion that we actually see each other, we can spend a whole day together. Despite being kind of a crappy friend, he has a long time limit.

Good friend #2. Good friend #2 is an excellent friend. She always is seeing how I’m doing, she’s lent me money without me asking, and she’s always down for whatever. What a great friend! But I find that after 4 hours I start to lose it. That’s because she has a medium-length time limit.

Annoying girl #1. Annoying girl #1 is a very nice person, very cheerful. Too cheerful, actually. She was in my circle of friends for a while. I could tolerate her personality for an hour. After that I would excuse myself. And I would not agree to do anything with her which might stick me with her for longer than that.

Annoying girl #2. Annoying girl #2 was a challenge for me. Again, she is a nice person, and a good friend to those who have longer time limits on her. Unfortunately, my time limit with her was only a few minutes. After that I found it nearly impossible to not make snarky comments at her. She didn’t do anything to me, I just can’t be with her for more than five minutes. Other people seem to like her just fine.

Annoying guy #1. Poor Annoying guy #1. He has a negative time limit with me. I get irritated before he opens his mouth. Just seeing him makes me want to throw things at his nasty face. Again, this guy is perfectly nice. It just so happens that even the possibility of having to interact with him expends my entire time limit on him.

I think the idea of time limits on people is very real, and that people would benefit from adopting the concept. It really adds an interesting dimension when describing other people. And in cases where you have a short time limit on someone, you are able to put the onus on yourself, rather than blaming the person for their grating personality, which they just can’t help. It also is a way of clarifying why you like someone who maybe isn’t that great of a friend. Now you don’t have to feel bad when you get sick of hanging out with your best friends—it’s not your fault that some of them have shorter time limits!