8.1 Two days after I was groped by a haredi kid, Maliya had her crotch grabbed on a bus by an Arab kid. He and his friends started “flirting” with her and being inappropriate, and then one grabbed her as she was getting off. I am so sorry that I have someone who understands exactly what I felt.
As if this wasn’t enough to make her hate men, her Israeli boyfriend acted really shitty and then they broke up. He was being moody, and she didn’t know what to do. He kicked her out of his house, and then didn’t call for like 4 days. He said his phone broke. (And even though she was friends with his friends, none of them had her number, and the Internet hasn’t reached the Israeli Army. That coward didn’t even try!) Then they broke up. I cried! I also have been treated like shit by someone I just wanted to make happy. I’ve also been the only one putting any effort into the relationship. It fucking sucks. They’re good friends now, and that just makes me more bitter that John never grew the balls to explain what made him turn into an asshole.
Our hostility to men has really increased over the past weeks, and I miss when I liked men. I liked men a lot. On a good note, I think my birth control Lutera (which I got for free at Planned Parenthood, G-d bless ‘em!) is making me crazy. My mood and body are off balance, and I think I’ll be back to normal if I go back on Mircette the Wonder Pill. Figuring that out was the highlight of the past two weeks.
8.2 My program had a Religion and State seminar day in the gay community center in Tel Aviv—which got gayer, by the way. A man from the Reform movement spoke, as well as a haredi man. He had interesting things to say and was respectful of other Jews, but opted to play semantic games rather than concede a small point to an audience member. We heard from a woman from Women of the Wall, a group that is seeking one hour a month to pray out loud, wear talit, and read from the Torah at the Kotel. She was an excellent speaker, but she was very one-sided. She came down hard on the segregated buses in Israel. (Some bus lines in haredi neighborhoods have separate seating for men and women. The women are in the back.) First off, they’re surprisingly pleasant. Second, Egged runs the same lines non-segregated. Attacking everything that religious people do that makes you uncomfortable is a losing battle. It’s best to stick to demanding your own rights. Segregation suits the community that lives along those bus lines. Zeh lo big deal.
What I found most interesting was that she learned to speak English without an accent by using a machine which would show her the wavelength of her speech, compared to how it should sound. When the wavelengths match up, you don’t have an accent!
8.3 Anna was absent from the seminar. I got a text around noon saying she had stomach aches and she was going to the hospital. She’s still there. I didn’t hear any more until we were heading back to Jerusalem in the afternoon. They thought it was appendicitis. Then they found that her right side was inflamed, and they said she had colitis. I went to bed under the impression that she had a serious but curable condition, and she would be fine in a week. But then they found that she had an auto-immune disorder. Her mom flew in from New York, and Anna spends most of the day sleeping. They have to clean her blood. Her extremities are numb, her vision is blurred, and she is very weak. Her mom answers her phone. I called to arrange a visit, but her mom said there was no point because she was too weak, but I could try again next week. Today’s news is that she is depressed and may be hospitalized for a month. I’m just glad we live in the 21st century.
8.4 A number of people from my program attended the MASA MegaEvent. MASA is part of the Jewish Agency, and it gives scholarships for long-term Israel programs. They gave me $3000 to come here. Benjamin Netanyahu spoke first. (That’s the Prime Minister.) His speech was kitchy and somewhat bizarre. Some quotes:
“Israel is your home—make aliya.” Roaring applause. (Would Obama tell a group of foreigners that America is their home?)
“Next year we’ll be celebrating in Jerusalem our capital—our UNITED capital!” More roaring applause. (We celebrated in Tel Aviv for its 100th birthday, so he said.)
“It’s the one place where every Jew can find a home and every Jew can FEEL at home.” Anyone boink an Israeli and have their mom cook you shakshuka in the morning?
“This is YOUR country.” Again, said to a group of foreigners. How are Israeli Arabs supposed to feel about this?
Bib has so far refused to admit that there will be a state of Palestine. He won’t say “two states.” He just won’t.
Bibi: “I have one message for you,” (pause)
audience member: “TWO STATES FOR TWO PEOPLE!”
Bibi: (telepathically instructing his guards to liquidate this intruder) “Have fun!”
It was so brilliant! Completing people’s sentences when they pause is one of my favorite amusements. It’s really an art for me.
It was a wildly corny night. After a while a bunch of us left to get sushi.
8.5 I babysat for two British kids and their two gigantic cats. I had planned to meet up with a friend at the mall afterwards and get kosher KFC and then go to my favorite pilates class. Midway through this exercise in containing my allergies and irritation at small children, I got a text message saying, “Currently a threat for a terror attack in Israel in an unknown location. Until further notice, there shall be no travel to malls or open markets anywhere in Israel.” No mall, no KFC, no adorable pilates teacher. I didn’t feel comfortable riding the bus, so I asked for a ride home. Both kids wanted to come along, so both parents went as well. The five of us sat in the car for half an hour as we slogged through afternoon traffic up hill into East Jerusalem. Fuck that. There has been no further notice, and the flakiness of the terror warning system concerns me. (Also, a good babysitting rate here is 25 NIS, which is about 6.25 USD. fml.)
8.6 There were two holidays in the past two weeks. Yom Yerushalaim (Jerusalem Day) was celebrated with demonstrations of uber-patriotic, flag-waving Jews who happily disregard the Arab third of Jerusalem. As I was waiting for a bus home in Katamon (where this huge cat family lives), a procession of black official sedans and armored vehicles came up the street. They stopped, with the last army vehicle swerved into the middle of the street right in front of my bus stop, and two bulky men with very large guns (even by Israeli standards) jumped out and looked around, gauging the likelihood of each pedestrian being a terrorist. The procession pulled up a few feet, and the guards walked after it. I asked another bus-waiter if this was normal (in Hebrew.) She said no, “sheh Bibi ba”—when Bibi comes. He was on his way to giving a Yom Yerushalaim speech. This country is tiny.
Shavuot also just passed. That holiday celebrates the giving of the Torah at Mt Sinai. We celebrate it by eating cheesecake and other dairy products. The Torah is like milk given to us by a benevolent and sustaining Mother. It is also traditional to stay up all night studying. I’m sure I could have found a place to do so (in English and friendly to women,) but I really didn’t have the ko’ach. I went on a long walk with some friends around our neighborhood, with splendid views of the West Bank and security fence. We are so close to it! A friend and I went to Chabad to hear the 10 Commandments. We were the only women to come along, and we were left behind the potted plant mehitza to our own devises. It was awkward, and the only person who talked to us was a horny yeshiva kid who clandestinely watches The Simpsons. I say he’s horny because there’s no other reason a yeshiva boy would talk to females.
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